The complexities of irony

So my friend and I are at our bar for our weekly fluid intake. I am nursing a Fat Tire as I am being lectured on how Alabama football is mentioned in the Bible somewhere and even though Tim Tebow is a nice Christian boy, it does not mean my friend would not take advantage if he had the opportunity to run him over with a H2. I am not paying much attention because I have heard this argument at least once a week since 2006 and because I am listening to the music being played over the speakers. I find myself bobbing my head to the beat and luckily I stop myself before I begin to sing along. I stop because I am ashamed.

Maybe it is the alcohol from the previous 3 beers or because I feel that I can say about anything to my friend of over 20 years, but I stop him mid-sentence to make a confession. "I just love Christina Aguilera."

My friend about spits out his Vodka Tonic. "What did you just say?"

"You heard me, I think Christina Aguilera can sing so much better than Brittany Spears and I think she is overlooked. Just listen. This is an amazing song."

"Seriously...you just said that. You. You who listen to the most obscure Indie bands out there."

"Yeah, I'm not proud of it. But what can I say? It's a guilty pleasure. Everyone has them."

My friend nods in agreement and then proceeds to look around the bar to see if anyone is listening. He leans over to whisper, "I have a guilty pleasure too. I really like John Denver and Barry Manilow."

I begin to laugh. "Those aren't guilty pleasures. They are too ironic and obscure to be a guilty pleasure."

"What do you mean? No one really listens to Barry Manilow under the age of 40."

"That is exactly why he can't be a guilty pleasure. Because no one listens to Barry Manilow then there is no reason why you should be ashamed to like him. As a matter of fact, you have more cred because no one listens to it. It's ironic."

My friend told me to shut up and continued to discuss why the Anti-Christ will be a Florida Gator.

As a result of that conversation, I feel the need to define guilty pleasure and irony and how they work. I might be wrong, but I don't think so.

A "guilty pleasure" is something, be it music, food, clothes, television, etc., that you enjoy that you would not like to admit to others out of fear as to how you would then be seen in their eyes. I will be discussing music primarily. You feel that their view of you would decrease as a result of learning that you like your guilty pleasure. This is not a question of what you like, but how others view what you like.

This is an important distinction to make. I feel in some ways you are not in control of what you like. I have tried to make myself like Metallica for years and just cannot do it. I just don't like Metallica. I apologize Mr. Keuller. Metallica obviously has talent because so many people who I respect love them, so obviously the issue is with me and not the band.

A guilty pleasure is something that you enjoy that causes you some degree of shame if those around you discovered this pleasure. Obviously those around, whom you care about their perception of you, also play a part in the definition of a guilty pleasure. If you don't care what your pastor thinks of you, then you would not mind if he found out you liked Lifehouse. However, if you cared what your emo girlfriend thought of you, you might care if she found out you liked Lifehouse since they are probably the band that defines the place furthest from emo.

However, just because something is uncool, that does not make it a guilty pleasure. Things that are uncool can become cool once they have reached such a degree of uncoolness that they begin to take on the glorious luster of irony. Time is a factor and so is obscurity. The more popular something is, in your environment - the environment and part of society you care about, the less irony it has.

A perfect example is the band Journey. Journey was very popular in the 1980's with Steve Perry screaming out lyrics of love and loss. I listened to Journey a lot as a young teenager and felt Mr. Perry's angst come through my Walkman as I sat on the church bus alone and mourned my current "ungirlfriend" state. Journey was awesome and it rocked.

However, once the grunge scene hit in the 1990's, we all put aside our RAWK cassettes for the Alternative CDs. And as a result, we left Journey behind. It would have surprised me to hear Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam declare that Journey was an amazing band during their tour of their first album "10". Journey's popularity was too close in time and proximity, and there were still some uncool people singing the line "I smell a wine and cheap perfume" at the top of their lungs. These were older people having children at that time and joining the beige middle class. The cool kids of the day pushed back against Journey because they were once popular and defined them as "old". As a result, it existed only on your Classic rock radio station.

However, about 4 years ago, enough time had lapsed in which it became acceptable to like Journey again. Journey's music had not changed over the years, but the perception of their music and it's place in the musical landscape had changed. Now you had indie hipsters talking about how awesome it was that Tony Soprano ended his television career to a Journey song. Independent music blogs put up old videos of Journey and for a while, Journey was the number one most downloaded band on iTunes. So Journey came back. It became cool to tell others of your affection of the song "Faithfully" because so much time had passed and no one liked them anymore.

Only once the masses use something up and then cast it aside, can that thing begin to grow irony. Once the irony has had enough time to grow, then it becomes available to be "rediscovered" and become cool once again. It needs to become so uncool that it becomes cool again. It is like Cabbage Patch Kids or Pugs. Each one is so ugly that it becomes cute. Something can become so uncool that it once again becomes cool due to the mighty power of irony.

For instance, Nickleback has zero irony, while Nelson has some irony. I would rather be known as a Nelson fan than a Nickleback fan. There is a big pushback against Nickelback in my corner of society. My dad listens to Nickelback. As a result of that and their immense popularity for their canned soft rock music, I can't stand them. However, Nelson was cool, went unbelievably uncool and so after 20 years, they are starting to grow a little irony.

Look at Cindy Lauper and Madonna. No one would question that Madonna has more talent than Cindy Lauper, but given Madonna's popularity for so long, there is a necessary backlash that must take place, and has taken place. However, the backlash against Cindy Lauper happened over 20 years ago and as a result, I feel it is better to be a Cindy Lauper fan and sing along to "Time after Time" than be a Madonna fan right now.

Facebook and Twitter have no irony, and they are still popular and I have no shame in using both. Facebook is starting to lose its appeal to me just because it is so overused and is so obligatory for all aspects of society. I think we are a few short years against a Facebook and/or Twitter backlash and the cool kids of the day will cast it aside. Maybe then enough time may have passed so that MySpace becomes cool once again.

Wearing a horrible Christmas sweater is so wonderful because of the fact it is so bad and you drop small ironic Christmas bells with every step. Wearing Dockers and a golf shirt has no irony at all. I would rather wear the horrible Christmas sweater.

Dave Matthews has zero irony while John Denver just oozes irony. However, I like both Dave Matthews and John Denver. Dave Matthews has not experienced a massive backlash due to his popularity, yet. Therefore I do not consider Dave Matthews a guilty pleasure.

I would be accepted more as a Miami Vice fan than a CSI-Miami fan.

Pabst Blue Ribbon is the best ironic beer in the world and I pick it over Coors Light every time.

Guns N' Roses were about to become ironic enough to be cool again until they release "Chinese Democracy" and now it is easy to hate them again. Give it another 10 years.

In about 20 years, James Blunt will be at the center of musical irony. He rose so high and was so popular, but his fall was as quick as his ascent. There was a huge James Blunt backlash so it will make the irony even more sweeter.

For me, Christina Aguilera is a guilty pleasure. I really like the way she sings and while she is not as popular currently as she once was, we are not far enough removed for their to be any irony here. The majority of society has pushed back against Ms. Aguilera and I understand that. However, to be true to myself, I like her and for that I am ashamed.

I have been in certain company in which I felt they would agree with the amount of irony associated with a certain band. However, I was wrong and in their eyes, there was no irony at all and I was mocked openly. Once in the middle of a conversation, I used a line from the House of Pain song "Jump Around". I thought it was pretty funny and ironic, but the others did not see it that way. They thought I was a huge fan and they made fun of me. They asked if I had closets full of Irish Hoodie Sweatshirts. Lesson learned...

Other guilty pleasures for me (with no irony) are as follows: The Clothing Store Old Navy, Five for Fighting, The Fray, John Mayer, Black Eyed Peas, Owl City, Plain White T's...alright that's enough. I am embarrassed now.

To summarize, a guilty pleasure is a function of what you like, what those you care about like, time and the amount of irony. It is different for everyone and once we all can look each other in the eye and admit that you do sing along to Sarah McLachlan, the more free we all will be.

Do you have any guilty pleasures?